The Power of Words Left Unspoken

In a coaching call yesterday with one of my clients, we identified a recurring theme in her life – avoiding communicating her true feelings to avoid possible conflict.

By being vague about how she really feels, she leaves room for misinterpretation, and she ends up in undesirable situations. Does this ever happen to you? 🥴

After digging, we discovered that some of her frustrations with her colleagues were based on assumptions - not truth. She had come to conclusions about her colleagues without getting the full picture from them first. With a few direct, well-mannered conversations, perhaps she could get to the bottom of any confusion and improve her relationship with her colleagues once and for all.

So what’s the pattern here?

So often it’s what we don’t say that makes all the difference.

We hold back our truth and our few words are misunderstood.

Our silence is mistaken for lack of care.

We don't ask direct questions, leaving so much unanswered, so much room for frustration.

It can be easier in the short-term to avoid uncomfortable conversations. But in the longer-term, both parties usually end up frustrated and misunderstood.

Sometimes we forget that our frustrations can be softened with something as simple as a conversation. You may not always end up with the outcome you wanted, but at least you'll have more clarity on the conflict than you did before.

Do you ever tend to beat around the bush?

Does it frustrate you that others don’t seem to understand how you feel?

If so, have you asked yourself:

What have you NOT YET said?

What have you ASSUMED was understood?

What questions have you NOT YET asked?

Now you know what you need to say.

If you've read and now feel inspired to have an important conversation - send me a message and let me know how it goes! If you're afraid to have the conversation, I get it. But ask yourself what you stand to gain from having it. And consider what you risk by not having it. Good luck!